REMARKCENTRAL

An evolution of form.

The gym and I have had an on/off relationship since my mid-20s. I achieved a form I was happy with when I was around 28 — men supposedly reach their muscle mass peak at 30 — and my body responded well then with youthful vigour and prime metabolism. Later in my mid-30s, the gym became a casual activity and I visited it once or twice a week to maintain form. My body didn’t react as quickly and it became a distracting and disappointing effort.

The real eye-opener came after my relocation to the UK in 2011. A new country, new job, new food, and new routines disrupted my rhythm. And I was simultaneously struggling with a relationship that crushed my confidence and self-esteem.

I was at my lowest in January 2013, on the cusp of turning 40. I was overweight and out of shape. My relationship was toxic, my self-esteem was gone, and I despised what I saw in the mirror. Determined to make a change, I ended my relationship and began a bold transformation. I celebrated my 40s with a fitness-focused attitude and body positivity — I wanted to reignite my sex drive, resculpt my body, and love myself again.

A body renaissance.

Since 2013, I’ve worked hard to keep my body, sexuality, and mindfulness in focus. I reached the pinnacle of muscular performance in 2018, but even now in 2025 I strive to maintain a full awareness of these three physical components. I tend to work out five days a week, usually for 45-60 minutes. My routine consists of chest/shoulders, arms, and back/full-body exercises, coupled with some cardio on my Peloton or the occasional run along the River Medway. When gyms closed in the UK in 2020 due to the pandemic, I invested in a home gym and kept my routine mostly the same. And now it’s become a permanent feature in our basement studio conversion.

For fitness advice, research different routines and find what works for you. Good form, understanding muscle groups, and paying attention to your diet are essential. Log your workouts and monitor your calorie intake. I recommend the Strong app for weightlifting, which integrates with HealthKit on Apple Watch. Apple Watch is beneficial and tracks your overall activities and cardio/VO2 max levels. And diet is vital for fitness success. Check out LoseIt or MyFitnessPal to track your calories and nutrition intake. I also use a digital scale from Withings to track weight, muscle mass, water, and other factors. Use smart technology to your advantage! 🤖

Now that I’m over 50 (😳) I’m more relaxed about my once-fanatical diet obsession. I stopped counting calories as I’m satisfied with my body. But I still pay attention to what I eat, which empowers better choices. At my peak fitness, all of my clean eating and low calorie intake gave me a very lean build. Now I prefer my bulkier build. Beef is back on the menu, boys! I’m proud to have made fitness a habit and integrated it into my lifestyle. Beyond the health benefits, it boosted my physical confidence. I appreciate my body’s transformation and enjoy capturing its growth through photos and selfies. The carousel below showcases the various stages of my body evolution — my leanest being 2018 through to 2020 and my thicker/bulkier form from 2021 to present.

Mind, sex, beard, stache.

In addition the attention I’ve give my body, I’ve made a point to ensure my mind stays calm. I started exploring mediation in 2018, and since then it has truly benefited my mental health. I’ve learned how to clear my head, foster loving-kindness, cultivate gratitude, and appreciate equanimity. It’s also deepened my connection with my body and sexuality. If you’re interested in exploring mindfulness, I highly recommend the Happier app. They offer wonderful resources, videos, and podcasts. In this chaotic, sad, and desperate world, meditation is a precious elixir for finding calm.

As my body confidence has increased since 2013, I have become quite comfortable with celebrating my sexuality. This includes naturism, kinks, and taking provocative photographs…hints of which can be viewed in the Gallery. Since meeting Luis, nudist beaches have been very enjoyable. We love living near Mediterranean Europe and enjoy vacationing in countries that tolerate and enjoy naturism much more than conservative America or England.

As I ease further into my 50s, my sex drive and sexual positivity has surged. Luis and I are consensual non-monogamists, enjoying the company of other men (together or separately) when desired. I like a variety of men and body types: younger lads, older woofers, hairy daddies, sexy couples, big-bellied bears, muscle studs. Luis and I communicate and trust each other deeply and we fully share, enjoy, and celebrate the male form. You can visit my Tumblr for a sample of what I find attractive, inspiring, and arousing.

Speaking of arousal, I’ve always admired beards and mustaches. I’ve channeled this masculine energy by growing my own facial hair, from goatees to long beards. In 2013, I decided to grow my beard indefinitely and it reached its peak in 2015. I kept a well-manicured beard for several years, but after months of repeated lockdowns in the UK and with barber shops opening and closing in 2020, I abandoned my pursuit of a well-sculpted beard and reverted to a thick mustache. Mustaches are classic, sexy, and embody the quintessential masculine look. Many men even grow mustaches for Movember, a month-long event that encourages donations and support for men’s health issues. My husband’s iconic stache was one of the factors that attracted me to him when we met.

In 2015, my longest beard led to an interview on the defunct website Groom Your Beard, which discussed beard styles and care. I also had a few revealing photoshoots for Meat Magazine’s Issue 19. My beard made a bold statement, along with other bits! 😏 I’m still intrigued by the bearded look and lifestyle, but I love the stached-daddy-vibe I’m channeling now. Visit my Tumblr to see a collection of attractive beards and facial hair. Questions about my body or stache? Ask me. And check out even more photos in my Gallery.

After you’ve enjoyed some of those photographic moments, let’s move on to my obsession with the most successful musical duo in UK history.